Mountains, Sunsets, Sand and Work, Work Work...

January 7, 2015

Complete change of plans, change of mind. We responded to our current park’s request for office and maintenance volunteers today, after long discussions about what “working” would mean to our lifestyle. We are still in Desert Hot Springs, next door to our beloved Cat Spa, at their sort of sister park, Desert Pools. We’ve stayed here a few times a few years ago, and were moderately impressed. We popped over here because it’s another of our club parks at $10 and change a night.

Desert Pools was just bought and is undergoing many upgrades…long needed. No real money has been put into this park for about 20 years, just barely maintained. So with a new owner and new management, they need help. It’s very common to have volunteers at RV parks, who then get a free site for the winter season. So we signed up for a thirty day trial to see if they like us and we like them.

We’ll work 30 hours combined in a three day week for the free site, one free wifi connection, tolerance of our two black cats and free laundry. Tony has already put in about five hours just today, as well as a staff meeting (barf!). I also attended the office staff meeting with the four working women and the manager and his wife. I’ll meet up with Linda the office manager for a few hours this week to see what they need. I swear if I can talk her out of putting me on the phone I will be hap-hap-happy. They have 900 names and info of park members to enter, and I would love that kind of scut work. I also have some showers I want to scrub until the grout is white again. My biggest dream, however, is to update their library.  It looks as though no customers have exchanged books in a long time.

Tomorrow is film day, The Breach, about Alaskan’s fishing industry. More popcorn!

January 20, 2015

Alex arrives at 11:00 PM for three days of fun in the sun! We are very excited to share our Big Blue life with her, get her some respite from jobs and weather.

El Gallito Lunch with Alex B.

The Breach, the movie I referenced above, is fantastic! It’s a documentary about wild salmon – remember that kind of fish?! The filmmaker follows the salmon from Idaho, Montana, Oregon, Washington, then to Alaska, describing how they are born and the beauty of their death while spawning. If you’ve never had the opportunity to see wild salmon surge upstream, red bodies, hooked mouth – please, please make an effort to do so in the near future.

The film’s ending highlights the now infamous Pebble Mine, a Canadian operation that is seeking to strip and core mine copper and gold…..in the middle of the wilderness that drains into Bristol Bay. This Bay supplies one half of the wild salmon…FOR THE WORLD! They are “pretty sure” there won’t be an ecological problem, despite the fact that there has never been a successfully clean copper mine…IN THE WORLD!

Their estimated profit: $500 Billion. The EPA did rule that a mine and a clean fishery are not compatible, but the fear is the lobbyists and politics involved with greed will push this disaster forward.

Our last movie is The Humbling based on Philip Roth’s last novel. The main character is played by Al Pacino, who proudly shows his aging self (please get a new haircut Al!) as he falls for a very young lesbian. Bizarre movie but funny and lovely to watch.  You can’t miss with Pacino!

While we were waiting in our theater seats at the Palm Springs High School, the drama department kids were cruising the aisles selling candy and water and…peanuts. Anyone who knows me has heard me mispronounce penis for peanuts. I crack myself up! So I said to Ton-Ton, “Did he say penis?” The woman ahead of me whips around and says, “No! Peanuts!” I laughed and said, “I know, I was joking.” She recovered herself and said, “Going for the young stuff now,huh?” Sometimes I just LOVE life. Tony and I then could hardly look at each other without laughing.

I started my first day of office work last Wednesday, a whirlwind of reservation system information and protocol, but it was fine. I work with the office manager, Linda, a rabid Seahawks fan, very knowledgeable and happy greeting our customers. It’s getting really busy here now and will be until spring, with rv’s and trailers coming and going. More people in the pools, activities are ramping up (water volleyball, line dancing, pool, crafts). Wednesday and Friday is BBQ burgers on the  pool deck for $4, Saturday morning is cinnamon rolls (Tony's fav), Saturday night is dinner (as staff we get half off!).

When I left the office that day I told Tony my stomach was hurting, thinking it might have been the burger they served at lunch. We made dinner and I went to bed feeling a bit nauseous, but not a big deal. Until I woke up at midnight sitting on the toilet AND vomiting. I haven’t thrown up in 25 years, hated it. Was so sick with…whatever for four days. Didn’t fulfill my work duties and felt guilty about that. Finally got back on my feet in time to go to our old Beer Hunter restaurant for the Seahawks game.

That game just twisted me up! Around the last two minutes I couldn’t take watching it anymore and went to the car to listen instead. I know, I know, I’m not a real twelve (never said I was), and I missed history in the making. It is what it is and I heard it happening instead of watching it. I was raised with zero sports in my house, no siblings in any sport, couldn’t care less about football. Basketball, yes. I don’t even know what’s going on half the time as far as the technical aspects of the game, but it’s been fun to watch. Tony has been a Seahawks lifer fan and he’s fun to watch too.

 I did fulfill my Desert Pools reading room chore yesterday by working for four long hours cleaning out old books, reorganizing the new and remaining books in alpha order. I bought poster board and marked them A to Z. I must have recycled over 100 Harlequin Romances! I try not to judge! I saved one called “The Hog Tied Groom” and gave it to new friends of ours. Here are the before and after and in between shots.

A Fraction of Old Books Tossed - Mostly Harlequin Romances!

A New Order, Alphabetized!

Unfortunately for the park, a few days after my four hour refurb, several women who had been monitoring it for several years couldn't handle the new look. They threw out all my alpha cards, and arranged the books not in alpha order - but by genre. Waste of time and boy was I hot that my work had been redone! Unfortunately my boss had to listen to the two complain FOR AN HOUR about the work I had done. Well, fuck you.

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February 5, 2015

One day before my brother Bernie's birthday!  January hosted my oldest sister Maureen's bday, and oldest brother Ken's bday.  Busy month for celebrating after the holidays.  February and March we have Great Nieces turning two, three and four. 

We have been crammin' busy with work and fun.  I decided we are too lazy on our four days off and have a list of activities and visits to  fun places to keep up on. We drove to the Whitewater Preserve up the road a bit and spent a few hours savoring the beautiful ponds, trails and mountains.  We plan on going back when Bernie and Ronna get here so that the three of us can hike a bit (Tony's feet won't cooperate with that).

TC at Whitewater Preserve Trout Pond

Whitewater Trout

We also finally went to the Palm Springs Air Museum, i.e., old soldier docents walking around old planes, helicopters, artifacts and stories by the dozens. We, of course, followed not the docent's suggested route but our own. Of course. In the out door of a cool old plane, caught up in the tour, chastised for not beginning at the beginning. Big whoop.

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February 22, 2015

Playing catch-up on the blog is a terrible disservice to my 21 followers.  I forget too much on a day to day basis; sunny blue skies, sand storms closing roads, car shows, pool time, work intrigues, cat antics, Tony's shenanigans ..... all roll around in my noggin for half a second then - poof - gone to some archive I'll not be accessing anytime soon.

Pictures jog my memory but may not be in the order they occurred.

We spend every Sunday now at our favorite coffee shop in North Palm, Koffie. Walking into the order line, gluten free muffin (singular) and double shot with a splash of half and half. Flow out the back door to ..... a beautiful oasis of chairs and tables, people grouping up, birds doing kamikazis past your head after eating your dropped crumbs, filtered sunlight through trees, surrounded by little shops full of expensive, unneeded items. Grass, flowers, trees, sun, and us. It's our garden of eden for a few hours.

Last person met there: Shelley Fisher, the Hebrew Hillbilly, a name so offensive, I hesitate to place it here. But it is her choice, after all.  In she wanders looking exactly like this:

We chat and she promotes herself. I ask for a pic of her for my blog, she lamely declines. Kind of looks like D. Parton without the excess breasteses.

Near the last night of our friend's long stay here we all went to El Paseo for dinner and the car cruise. They are truly dear people, Joy and Frank, and we look forward to seeing them on our return to Poulsbo, as they live in W. Seattle. We spent many days in the sun at the pool with them, sharing lives. Tony and Frank, in particular, took to each other like long lost friends.

Frank and Joy in the El Paseo Golf Cart!

We recently went to an antique car show that was fun to see, but too hot to stay to the end. A few shots of the beauties present:

My sister Dawn arrives March 9th through the 13th. More sun and fun, pool time de rigeur. Bernie and Ronna should be here by the end of the month, maybe a few more days? Delayed arrival due to a rental sale, finishing their new home in Sunland, moving his massive shop, etc.

Oh! Here are our traveling cards that Tony had made up, one side for him, and one for me. Very cool.

Front and Back of our Traveling Cards

Another adventure Is Pioneertown, an old West faux-fronted "town", the heart of which is Pappy and Harriet's Palace. In digging around for more things to see around here I happened upon this gem of a musical mecca. Old, funky building with many old, funky add-ons. Good enough menu, crammed with people on a Friday night, free angst-ridden music by youth who spend an inordinate amount of time getting their sound board just right. We're then unable to hear any words to their songs due to the high decibal of their instruments. We ate and wandered around, soaking up the vitality of this place.  We will be back!

Outside Pappy and Harriet's Palace

Sky in Pioneertown

My efforts to garner tickets to the ultra billionaire publishers the Annenberg's Sunnylands estate has proven impossible. They release tickets for the house tour - at $35 a person - twice a month. If you're not ON IT the minute the phones open, you're lost for at least another half month. We went anyway to tour the free grounds and "museum", which is lovely and iconic, all of it. This was the same week Obama was here, and AT Sunnylands, as many past presidents have been. It's called the "Camp David of the West" due to the many detente meetings held amidst the lakes and golf course and mid-century modern home. We wandered the labyrinth and greens and symmetrical desert cacti, stopping for an espresso at their lovely cafe. Sat in the cool shade on a hot day, surrounded by beauty and peace. And we loved the little white iron chairs with their little teeny elbow arms. Tee hee!

Elbow Arms at Sunnylands 

TC at Sunnylands

Work, yes work. We continue our plumbing and welcoming three days a week. It's all much easier for me now although the reservation system is rife with possible errors. We laugh alot, Linda and I, managers Roger and Joannie, office staffers Shiri and Mary. Our learning curve is slowly lessening to more manageable. I'm still challenged by the many RV clubs that receive discounts; here are many different rules and restrictions for each. Some allow a week in the park at a discounted rate, some two weeks. All require a week out of the park - or paying the public park fee of $45.00 a night for a week. The phone is an open sore for me, but we've just put in place another volunteer to answer them and take reservations. I hate answering phones, did it my whole career,never want to answer another one - even my own I monitor, text whenever feasible!

Staff Potluck

I've also included a pic of our neighbors Airstream, Bud and Claudia. It has seen better days, as have they, but they're all still plugging along. A fellow volunteer got inside the rig and said it's too far gone for refurb. Bud is a character, lots of stories. Takes kind care of his wife who is a little tottery on her pins. They;'ll be back again in March with their Long Beach Airstream Club. I made that group reservation, our first one!

Nothing like an Airstream

And last, but certainly not least, a box arrived from my dear Jr High/High School friend Cathy Hutchison Bellah! She gets subscriptions to a bunch of beauty/health boxes each month and asked if she could share with me.  YES! This picture is of me surrounded by the MANY wonderful items she sent - shampoo, face cleanser/moisturizer, tea, nail polish, perfume, cologne...on and on! Each item was grouped in a little bag tied with a pretty ribbon. It felt like Christmas in the desert! I have been having a ball using these products and THANK, THANK, THANK her for her generosity.

Excited me with my gift box o'goodies!

And a picture of the swimming suit Alex picked out for me, in case you missed it on FB!

Jackie and her new swim suit!

A View From the Desert, a View of My Bowels...

December 12, 2014

Well, guess what happened since I last wrote on November 30^th?  Hmmmm?!  It was my 58^th birthday…..it was, really! Very exciting day for all of you I’m sure. It was for moi. Let me run a recap by you in case you’re curious as to just how I spent this august day:

1)      Woke at 7:30 AM, put bathing suit on, went to “big pool” for our first water aerobic class. Now, we’ve been consistently attending our water stretching class five days a week – the singing one, which we love. The big pool class, we were assured by the energizer bunny instructor, is MUCH better, with lots of energizing exercise. We’re used to a vigorous class at our Poulsbo Athletic Club so thought, “Cool, we’ll add these two days to our week and get a little more oomph out of the class than singing. It was NOT as hardcore as Poulsbo, so was a bit of a disappointment. Still felt good, however, to move a little quicker, a little differently.

2)      As Ton-Ton sped off to his blood draw, I started the laundry and waited for our 10 AM water stretching class. The dear women there, most of whom don’t really know my name, sang me happy birthday twice.  Blessed me!

3)      We took ourselves off to the big pool for some righteous, 80 degree sunshine. We not only basked, swam and basked again…we had a couple of wonderfully thorough conversations about all sorts of stuff.

4)      Showered up, top down. 5 Guys burgers here we come! Yes, after seven months of towing the food line and renewing my health, I decided to DIVE full circle into not only a burger with a bun, but French fries! For dinner I planned on In N Out burger and then a Cheesecake Factory piece of cake.

5)      Delightful, delicious cheeseburger with half a regular size fry in ma’ belleh! OK, was not as fulfilling emotionally as I though it would be but hey, fries! In ma’ belleh!

6)      Home again, talking with a few new friends here, I felt a rumble down below, with what felt like a possible breach of my sphincter. I continued pointing my listening face at our talking friend as I backed up slowly toward the door – it also seemed prudent to listen to my sphincter voice bellowing. At the door I was up the stairs heading for the bathroom when…..my sphincter gave way. Luckily my undies and shorts were holding their ground, but the explosion in my panties, I could feel, was not to be taken lightly. I’ll spare you a written word picture of the disaster that ensued, but be assured, it was on the grounds of the recent Hawaiian volcano spewing hot lava over a peaceful village.

7)      Lesson learned: do not think you are smarter than the food you shouldn’t eat.

8)      Because of my unexpected and unwanted anal leakage, In N Out was off, as was any thought of cheesecake. I spent the rest of the evening happily reading.

9)      The Day After: not feeling so well, stomach a bit achy, muscles a little sore. We rolled out and did a bunch of errands later THEN picked up my vanilla cheesecrack. Didn’t want to eat it that night so stupidly left it sitting on countertop all night. Made for a watery, mushy mess – which I still hooved down for dinner the next evening.

10)   Second Day After: never dressed, never showered – because I didn’t want to. Spent all day messing around in my underwear and skimpy top, while the Tony ran his own errands. Probably wanted to get away from my skanky ass. I went to my bedlove around 2:00 PM, rolling around eating pistachios and reading three books at once, cats lolling near me on the bed. I love my hibernation chamber so much – everything is at hand, including my happiness.

The 10^th also brought around my first day of my online writing class. I signed on and began my new journey, looking forward to seeing which way this path will take me. I loved it. Assignment: read books in whatever genre(s) you may want to write in; read archives of articles from the Washington Post called “Writers on Writing.” Devoured them; write ten minutes a day, mandatory. Can do.

I’m finding that my head is BLOWING UP with ideas to write and write. I am jotting them down as fast as I can, filling pages of a new writing journal my sister Dawn sent me for my birthday. I feel stared at, as if everyone around me can see words, sentences, paragraphs spilling out of the top of my head, my mouth and nose. I feel alive!

December 19, 2014

Saying goodbye to a happy place is never easy when RV’ing. As humans, we personalize everything we see and touch: patches of lawn, oleander bushes, neighbors packed tight to our rig, those who walk by with their dog(s) everyday, the laundry room, library and pool(s). My lightbulb here is that I want everywhere we stop to be home – if even for 24 hours, or a mear two weeks.

We’ve been at Indian Wells RV in Indio, CA since November 15^th and have enjoyed every moment. When you arrive as a new camper, the permanents are watching you pretty carefully as they swim and stroll and attend doughnut day: are you worthy to get to know, they ask themselves and each other? New acquaintance making in the RV world is like treading water in a pool; circle, circle, move those arms and legs; occasionally stop and sniff around the various statements made, beliefs aired. Do they mesh with your world or not? Most of the time, even if political or social beliefs are 180 out, they’re interesting enough topics to pursue and discuss.  Sometimes, not so much.

Decoration at Indian Wells...Santa Pops Out!

I know this about myself now: my feet itch like crazy after about three weeks. This is the longest we’ve stayed anywhere after four years on the road, the exception being a month at a county park in Florida last year. We made dear friends there too, whom I’ve never received an email response from in a year – and we promised to stay in touch!  I found myself pulling back, shutting down the social circles we had tentatively made here, and realized that’s my way of not saying goodbye – a social necessity I detest. I, in fact, am glad to be moving on, despite our wonderful moments here.  They’re done, buh bye.

That leaves us to finish packing and stowing today, leaving the RV at the Walmart parking lot, finish a bit of shopping  at my favorite stores - Whole Foods and Trader Joe’s (which are far away from our next destination, Desert Hot Springs). Always, always bittersweet moment to pack up. I know I go into a sad little denouement during the travel time from one spot to another: an ending and a beginning. Usually by the time we reach our new spot, I’m excited about setting back up and meeting new people.

For those interested our camp break-down goes something like this:

1)      Tony concentrates on the outside pack-up such as sewer and water hoses disconnected and stowed. Electric unplugged and tucked away. Chairs and rake refolded, BBQ cleaned and stowed. Check coach (storage) doors are secure, start rig, pull out and reattach tow dolly.

2)      As we are both “pilers” of stuff collected and unpacked during our stay-times (magazines, books, newspapers, flyers from the Chamber), Jackie works on tidying the inside: clear off dashboard of loose items (measuring tape, TC’s hearing aid container, electronic fault finder, wipe cloths, screws/nuts/bolts/washers, TC’s extra glasses, tools); clean off driver’s seat and floor of towels, bathing suits, tool bag, newspapers, etc.; clean and stow TV tray and Macbook; clean and stow all items collected on Jackie’s table (leather bag o’ junk-drawer-type stuff: post cards, fan from the Ryman in Nashville, woolen ball, receipts to enter into spreadsheet, nail clippers, cat comb, et al), glucometer, tablets, TV clickers, phone, writing journal, scissors. Bundle garbage and recyclables and replace with new bags/containers. Kitchen items: salt and pepper put in cupboard, butter dish in sink, dishes put away; sink, stove and countertop cleaned and disinfected, pots and pans stowed in oven, stove top refolded over burners; Sodastream stowed on bed; soap, sponge, cat food spoon and green cleaner put in sink, sink tops returned to place. Bathroom counter cleared off and all items stowed in cabinets or sink, litter box cleaned of poop, trash tossed and bag replaced, toilet cleaned from top to bottom. Bed made, cabinet doors shut, cpaps pushed back, shades up.

Green clean all of rig: window “sills” wiped down, windows cleaned, windows closed, shades up. Wipe down kitchen and bathroom counters, dashboard, kitchen cabinets and drawers. Clean all mirrors. Sweep always gritty floor, Swiffer constantly swept floor. Make sure cats are inside, check under couch for Blackie-Me-Boy. Make sure antenna is down. Check check list on door: Fridge, Antenna, Vents, Windows, Cats, O’Head, Step, Door Locked – the final check to avoid disaster.

At 1:30 I’ll be fitted for a pair of hearing aids provided by Labor and Industries, due to the heavy duty work atmosphere I spent my life working within such as canneries, fish processors,WSF repair yard and engine rooms. Yes, HEARING AIDS! Causes me to pause and think of my body aging – yes it is happening Jackie, can be seen plainly in pictures - the sagging skin, belly weight, LINES.

As for these new hearing aids, I’m feeling the need will be greater in the future and I may as well get used to them now – at no cost to me. Not only has my hearing declined sharply in the last few years, but I have tinnitus in my left ear – a constant high pitched ringing. Found an L and I preferred hearing aid clinic with am extremely creepy dispenser-guy, Dean, and it is working out well. My intuition tells me that Dean is a hedonist. I've had three visits to him - and more to come - to adjust my hearing aids for my benefit and explain some of their tricks, which he is very good at doing. His remarks about his newly sober life, partying with frat buds (he's 63), barely contained excitement while not looking at my cleavage...creeper. Tony confirmed

Now ensconced in our home away from home in Desert Hot Springs (DHS) – Catalina Spa! Or "Cat Spa" as we locals lovingly call the joint. I feel so happy being here at our first and favorite spot. This is the place that has the best mineral hot springs – think 20 people – spa tub. Next to that is the mineral springs pool, adrift with groups of chatty people. The cats are in heaven with tons of sand to roll and poop in – yes, we clean it up.

December 20^th, 2014

Today we will spend the next four with the Hunter’s – John, Sandi and Holli – here for Disneyland, beach and pool. The pool we can provide, in spades. Having never been to the Coachella Valley, we’ll be touring around as well – Joshua Tree, the tram, the ritzy El Paseo, Palm Springs itself. And the pools…

We are very excited about sharing this beautiful valley with them.  We’ll get Holli to spend the night, or as many as she’d like with us, with the promise of a blue mineral pool always in her dreams.

While the Hunter's stayed at Aunt Rose's beautiful home in San Jacinto, about an hour's drive from DHS, they trekked to us every day for a tour of one kind or another. I've experienced Joshua Tree National Park just north of DHS as a highly spiritual, centering natural occurrence. As we drove through the park in their rental car and got closer and closer to the hundreds of acres of unique and beautiful extruded rocks, we had great conversations among all of us, conversations we're often too busy to have back home. It was lovely.

Rose and Holli at the Soboda Country Club

We stopped at several campgrounds, John, Sandi and Holli hiking a bit in the rocks. It is incredibly beautiful with the blue sky, sun warming those up-thrusting rocks, campers sitting around their fires (smells delicious!), walking back from their rock climbing or hiking. Lots of youth. Joshua Tree camp sites are primitive,especially for an RV - no water, no electricity. We stayed their on our very first venture out in Blue and not only drained our batteries but damn near froze at night.  In other words, totally unprepared for this life.

Grandpa and Holli at Joshua Tree

Tony and daughter Sandi in Joshua Tree

TC and JB FRONT Photobombing John and Holli

John and Holli returned the next day to hike some more, which we loved.  Sandi, Tony and I hung by the pool in the sun, then met the other two at Rose's for the Seahawk's game. Go Hawks!

We also hung around downtown Palm Springs and watched the world go by, ate at our precious El Gallito, and spent a warm evening walking the Gucci-rich El Paseo Ave. The latter was a hit with everyone!

Tony, Sandi, John, Holli and Jackie at El Gallito

Our El Gallito...TC, Sandi, Holli and John

They flew out the next day, back to the wind, rain and power outages - but what a great time they had in SOCAL!  Next up, Alex!

Had my hearing aids fit and tested with great success yesterday. Strange wearing something in my abnormally itchy ears but it does improve what little sound I need help with at this time of my life. Many visits to follow, as outlined above.

Christmas Dinner at Catalina Spa

My 1950's Christmas Pillow Covers...Love Them!

December 29, 2014

My online writing class, “Writerrific”, has me turning around looking for my truth, irritated, annoyed, angry, intrigued. The instructor has two rules that I don’t wish to follow: 1) No foul language; 2) Don’t say anything “mean” about your classmate’s writing. Bullshit. How can one write from the heart with rules?!

I’ve done my assignments, only one that involves writing so far – write yourself as a color – barf. I’ve duly read everyone else’s depiction of being various colors, some really, really good, surprisingly – that’s my “intrigue” – some difficult to read because they’re not well written.

There are some who are quite worried about every assignment, questioning the teacher endlessly. The amount of classmates and their geography is fascinating…all over the US, Australia, the United Kingdom. The instructor is quite the author with many books both written by her, and she acting as a ghost writer for others. She’s enthusiastically upbeat in her remarks to all the classmates; it’s OK with me, but kind of smarmy.Likes to throw in her love of Christian writing with another classmate so inclined. Again, barf.

My next assignment is called a Bubble exercise. I am to clip a newspaper article, then find ten or more sub items that I may use to write about the subject, then ten or more about the sub items, etc. You jot these items around the initial subject, thus a “bubble” is formed. It’s brainstorming, really. Haven’t started it yet – of course Betty, the class favorite, began immediately. It’s supposed to rain the next few days so I will attempt the assignment, AND finishing this blog…

December 30, 2014

Back from a long day driving the valley visiting doctor for poop analysis: four of five tests for bacteria came back negative; more blood tests; eat a bland diet; drink ginger ale. She had on her “irritated doctor face” when I took her on a short trip through Jackie-land from June to present. She obviously does not approve of my meat and veggies diet although couldn’t quite condemn me due to the success I’ve had in conquering my diabetes.  Crappy dresser too, and yes, my super-judgy self is holding that against her. Sausage roll for bangs, please!

I was really down when I left her, feeling scolded for not, in her opinion, eating properly. She said that my guts are in turmoil from….something, and that I need a bland diet such as rice, apple, toast (the BRAT diet minus the B due to high carbs). I told her I likely wouldn’t eat any of those, although in retrospect a little rice, toast and apple wouldn’t kill me. I have a phone interview with my Doc on the 5th and I’ll run all this by her to see what her advice is for me.

I am also not to go in the pool until this is diagnosed, as I may be spreading whatever I have to others. She posits that I may have gotten something from a pool, water at a park; suggested I drink bottled water until we clear this up. So many “ifs.”

While TC and I were in the store yesterday – Vons, which is really Safeway – I saw a group of four handsome Asian boy/men picking up large red Dixie cups, teased them about their drinking that night. “Yes ma’m”, they confirmed. As I walked past them one ventured, “Do you want to join us?”, as the others were shushing him. HA! I felt both totally creeped out and a smidge flattered. My mind ran through what I would have done as a drunk 20 years ago, may have made a terrible choice, as drunks often do. I told them those party days were over for me 20 years ago and they politely congratulated me. HA again!

January 6, 2014

We moved just down the street from Cat Spa to Desert Pools, which we've heard is being revamped. Haven't been there in a couple of years so are looking forward to seeing what the haps are there. I drove through the park with the car picking a spot out suitable for the cats - god forbid they should be mentally damaged by our move!, while Tony checked in at the office. On my return he reports being chided for my drive-through (not allowed!). The office manager, Linda, in her Seahawks shirt was welcoming, informative and slightly irritating.

Roku, or, Kitty Boy, On Rock at Desert Pools

We eventually changed sites (not allowed!) which I made Tony take care of as I didn't want to hear her lecture us on the rules. Nice spot, cats are happy, no one around.

We've settled in for our not usual RPI week (usually two as an RPI Preferred customer), headed to the pool, braved the 27 degree mornings and 45 degree nights. Looming is Friday the 9th when we need to have a secured site elsewhere.....but where?

Meanwhile.....we have a club dinner to attend (masses of fun and great people, crappy ribs), three movies I picked from the Palm Springs International Film Festival, friends to talk with, overused the data allowance, daughters to worry about, assignments to write.

I have been thinking again, alot. Couldn't sleep the other night due to many hurricane thoughts running, nay, leaping/jumping/meandering through my Norwegian brain. I think I slept four or five hours, worrying through my poop problems, moving the RV, feeling like a fat hog when I saw a picture of myself - I thought I looked nice that day!

I spilled it all to Tony the next morning, trying to clear the old bean, and it did. We have been talking about volunteering at this park as they've advertised the need for office and maintenance staff, worked through our presentation and credentials.

We are on the staff for 30 days and will see what that brings.The advantage is we have a free spot, with one free wifi connection for the duration. Our downside, which may not be a negative, is the restriction of 30 hours a week, split between us.

Had a marvelous lunch with our friends Nina and George Pederson at their iconic mid-century home in Rancho Mirage. George is a fantastic cook and served us lobster tails, scallops in dill butter, white asparagus, rolls and colseslaw. They are also fascinating people and although we are on opposite sides of the political spectrum, we steer away from those topics, in general, and lend our conversations more to our activities, and lately, our health issues.

Nina and George's Marvelous Living Room

Nina, George, Tony and Jackie

Turkeys and Pools...

November 30, 2014

For starting so late in the fall/winter “season” of 2014’s RV’ing this is a most excellent November-cum-December. Another Thanksgiving, day of many thanks for our beautiful retirement to the sun, our family, our friends. At almost 58, each holiday, anniversary or birthday brings a flashback of memories from a film in my head of past gatherings and celebrations. 

My ex-husband, Alex’s one and only father, Doug, is fading again. A staunch believer in drinking, smoking and various pill-popping; not opening the creaky old box that was his fucked up childhood; never, never once, addressing the abuse to his mind and body from a series of his Mormon mother’s “boyfriends” directed toward both he and his dear sister Kathy, leaves him a tiny soft-shelled crab, all structure burned away with poison. Our life together is one that spends a lot of time unreeling in my mind’s movie theater – no popcorn or Dr. Pepper, no faux velvet seats stickily rocking me, marking each day of our unlucky years together. 

He has been sick with drink for years and years, never really quitting the shit, just abstaining for a bit in order to let his body recover to start in again. His life is made of promises broken to himself and a dwindling few people left in his life – there is really no one left, no friends, no family, who want one such as him in their life. He is broken, suffering physically and mentally, scornful of love, even for his dear daughter.

She hears from him occasionally, when he’s either sober for a short while – and by short I mean a day, hours – or “shmammered” out of his mind on street oxy’s, beer and vodka. Now he’s calling her because he has a “business proposal” for her, consisting of the following:

1)      Needs help paying his bills – not monetarily, he has money – but physically. He is so debilitated that he can’t write anymore, including signing checks. He needs to sign over his accounts to Alex but she needs to get him to the bank in order for that to happen and he can’t be transported without an ambulance, which he refuses. The ambulance drivers, Sheriffs, local cops, hospital staff know him by name.

2)      His recent “mini” stroke compounded by his continuous drinking and pill-popping  has left him unable to leave his barcalounger. Smelling food makes him nauseous therefore he doesn’t eat; what he does manage to get down is frozen food, beer, oj and vodka. Weakened by no nutritious food or drink, his muscles can’t support his skinny-ass frame anymore. He keeps a pee bottle next to his lounger due to his little problem of not being ambulatory. We shudder to think what he does for the pooping…

3)      He insists he does not want an ambulance called, does not want to go to a hospital or care facility , although he admits he needs help. He is sick enough that Alex can’t manage him in her car.

4)      He has no teeth, a heart valve was replaced, plates in his wrists, cancer in his  prostate and perhaps elsewhere, liver and other filter organs on the way out from the abuse they’ve suffered. No wife, girlfriend, siblings who care; no parents; no friends. All have been consistently and poisonously shoved away over 30 years. There is no one left to care if he lives or dies or suffers, except Alex, Tony and I. 

Alex is brave, braver than a neglected daughter need be. She is performing tasks for him as she can, between her two jobs. His “business proposition” for her is that he pays her as he would any aide. Thus far she cleans his house, buys him vodka, pays his bills. Her next task is trying to make sense of Medicare and VA to see what help they offer. She must repeat any information many times in order for his brain to slowly comprehend any of her words. These tasks are hard for this beautiful woman who was never, never shown a fractal of consideration from this man who unknowingly donated his sperm to my egg. 

His relationship to Alex is actually like the weird family uncle: occasionally shows up for a family gathering shitfaced – makes inappropriate comments to all present, especially the women (“If she were my daughter I’d…”).  He never attended a parent teacher conference, science fair, talent show, camp. In ten years he may have shown up, buzzed, to maybe a half dozen 4H horse shows; he certainly didn’t come to the state fair in Puyallup when Alex qualified, twice. In short – he nominally cared for her but abundantly and lovingly cared for his booze.

That is why we eventually ended our marriage, a beer and a bump always stood between us from the minute we met in Alaska. I think we had ten, maybe fifteen years together, two of them separated. Hard to remember as I was shitfaced most of that time too. He cried when I confirmed Tony and I were seeing each other, wailing, “But we were going to get back together!!!” Really?! Uh, when was that going to happen? We had two years apart but he never said he missed me, loved me, wanted his family back. I got sober, he didn’t. How was that going to work out, Doug?

He’s had so many close calls with death the last 25 years that I’m always yearning to call our old friends, the ones that he attended boat school with, those who were his best man and roommates, all those men and women he worked beside on vessels as a shipwright, a captain, a mate, a carpenter. When I’ve succumbed to that yearning and called, none of the men are in the least sympathetic to his decline. They truly don’t care to hear about him, and certainly refuse my suggestion that they visit him to try and talk some sense into his addled ass. As one of them said when I contacted him last year, “There’s nothing I can say that will sober him up.”

After our crazy, lustful affair in Alaska his live-in girlfriend moved in with his best friend and he came looking for me – her replacement, I guess. That color film running in my brain is a smiling, handsome, charming, funny Doug tracking me down from his home in north Seattle, to my dad’s in south Seattle. The joy I felt at seeing him astonished me, as in some way I felt we had just been a fling; it surprised me that I still wanted to be flung by him. He made me feel so beautiful and sexy, my skinny no-breasted 22 year old college educated self, suddenly willing to end a three year relationship with a man who would not commit a lifetime to me, barreling full force into a constantly drinking, irreverent, talented, manipulative mustached man. God the roller coaster that ensued! And the baby girl that was the best result of our chaos.

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We spent Thanksgiving day with our sister-in-law Rose about an hour’s drive west in San Jacinto. Only eight of us bumping around her beautiful home and only two allowed to cook – Rose and her brother in law Steve. Her sister Margaret, she of many smiles and easy laugh, nephew Matt and wonderful wife Yoshiko, Tony and I made up the rest of the vagabonds longing for turkey. I put aside my meat and veggies menu for the full fisted version and had at least bites of mashed spuds and gravy, stuffing made with Rose’s fresh sage, my sweet potato casserole. That’s living.

I also discovered a table implement completely and delightfully new to me – a personal gravy boat! I get such enormous joy out of the discovery of such a small thing. And I was the only on utilizing one at the table because I’m special.

Rose and my private gravy bowl.

After dinner with the Seahawks playing, we begged off and ran for home to finish the game. And what a damn game it was! Trounced those Cards, putting them behind us again. 

This post Thanksgiving weekend we have done zero. Well, we did lie in the sun at the pool as after all it’s not snowing here, as it is in the NW. 75 here, 25 there. That is all.